Thor review

Thor is one of those superheroes that I did not know existed until the movie came out. Then when the movie did come out I never saw it in theaters (I’m not sure why, my dad said that Thor is one of his favorite superheroes, it’s sorta weird that we saw Captain America but not Thor, but whatever). Anyway, I’m watching Thor and only one thought is going through my mind:

I liked Captain America better.

I couldn’t help it, I really couldn’t. I really, really, REALLY wished that I had seen Thor first then I could be all like “WOW I love this movie!” then once I saw Captain America I could be like “OMG I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH! I LOVE CHRIS EVENS! I LOVE CAPTAIN AMERICA  <3 <3 <3” (I’m not sure how I would say the “<3” but I’m sure I would have found a way.)

And you may be wondering WHY I liked Captain America better. It’s really not a simple answer, but I’ll try my best to show my mind to all of you.

1: the girl, Jane (Natalie Portman) kinda bugged me. Don’t get me wrong, I like Natalie Portman in almost everything she has been in (Except the Star Wars films, I hate the prequels of Star Wars and I always will, but that is a completely different review all together) but she bugged me nonetheless. For example, (Spoiler!) at the end when Thor finally gets his power back and he’s all dressed up in his getup Jane says, “is this how you always look?” Thor responds, “More or less,” and Jane is all like, “It’s a good look” while shaking her head and checking him out.  All this tells me is that Jane only likes Thor for his body and not for his attitude or for his mind or his actions or anything other then his body. Nice. Really smooth. Now if you compare Jane to Peggy Carter from Captain America then you will see the exact opposite. Peggy Carter liked Steve Rogers even before he became Captain America. When he was tiny and small and very unattractive. Then he became supermegaawesomehot Captain America and Peggy obviously didn’t complain, but she liked him the exact same. Some how this sort of love seems a lot more sincere, I can’t imagine why.

2: the animation was not good at all. In fact, it is what you would call horrible. Captain America’s animation was not very good as well, but the movie was not so dependent on the animation that it was super noticeable. But Thor was the exact opposite, the story required so much animation, and since it wasn’t that good the poor quality of the animation was much more noticeable. At some points I felt like I was in a video game. I feel like they could have tried a bit harder in that regard, but I guess no one asked Molly before making this movie.

3: Thor goes from being a total jerk to being an awesome guy that makes you eggs in the morning in like 5 minutes. What the heck happened? Not a lot of actual changing time takes place in between jerk Thor and nice Thor.  Although I did say that I did not like the fact that Captain America did not have a lot of character development, I do think that it sorta works better in a movie that is only 1 ½ hours to 2 hours long not to have major character change.

So those are the 3 major reasons why I did not like Thor. But despite these things I have said, I did enjoy the movie. And that’s what you’re supposed to do! You are supposed to go to the movies to enjoy whatever movie you see, and this movie is one of those movies that you will laugh at, that you will appreciate, that you will enjoy! I recommend this to anyone who likes Marvel movies.

My rating: 79

rating: PG-13 for some slight language.

the planet of the apes (Origanal)

So I watched the Planet of the Apes for the first time in 11 years. when I was 5 the story was a bit more compelling, I’m not even going to lie. like when you first see the statue of liberty and you are like, “Whaaaaaaaaaaaattttttt??? they are on EARTH??? WOW!” or at lest that’s the way I was.

then I saw it again as a 16 year old….

Its not a bad movie. its not a great movie either, but there is a reason that it is one of the most remembered movies of all movie history, and that reason is that it makes you think on a deeper level about what it means to be human. For instance, if a ape walks like a human, talks like a human, thinks like a human, and acts like a human does that make him an equal to humans? or is there some other trait that separates us from the beasts? all that is really interesting factors of The Planet of the Apes, but then you start to get into the more nitty gritty parts of the Planet of the Apes and you realize that there are some major holes in their logic. Like if Tyler is supposedly super smart guy then how come he doesn’t realize that the planet he’s on is earth? let me count the ways that the movie gives away that its earth they are on:

1: they were supposed to land on earth

2: they could breathe the air

3: there are humans

4: there is plant life

5: there are apes

6: all the apes speak English

7: at the end when they are proving that humans ruled the earth before apes, Tyler knew that the proof was a hearing aid, a piece holder, and a glasses

8: there was a doll that said “maaaaaaamaaaaaa” in a creepy way that it did

isn’t that enough evidence you need to infer that you are on earth? if it were me, I would think it was earth just on the fact that they were supposed to land on earth. so why doesn’t Tyler think that? why does he think they are on a completely other planet? what evidence does he have? I’ll tell you what evidence he has… NONE! ZIP! NADA!

So why does he insist that it is not earth until the very end when the statue of liberty is buried in the sand? why? WHY? DARN YOU ALL! DARN YOU ALL TO HECK!

other then that…good movie, very much worth seeing if you haven’t, in which case you shouldn’t have read my review because it is literally all spoilers, but come on this is over a almost 40 year old movie, deal with it, if you already didn’t know the things I said then you should be banned from society. Goodbye!

haha just kidding (or am I?)

my grade: 90% on account of being awesome and old.

Rating: PG (I think?) I would say it is actually PG-13 now a days though because there is cussing in it, nothing bad, just a lot of little swear words.

My ending thoughts: see it.